Twelve Days of Christmas : Kinky version

[castalie]

I guess a lot of slashers (or hetters) are going to write their own twisted lyrics, but see, each year, I saw people doing that NC-17 version of 'Twelve Days of Christmas', and I kept promising myself I would write one of my own- so here, I did it *beaming*

I tried to stick to the tune, but you know how it is - hopefully it'll fit *crosses fingers*



On the first day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe :
A most lovely vanilla lube.

On the second day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the third day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the fourth day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe,
Four cock rings,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the fifth day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe,
Five anal beads,
Four cock rings,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the sixth day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe,
Six enema kits,
Five anal beads,
Four cock rings,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the seventh day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe,
Seven sounding spankings,
Six enema kits,
Five anal beads,
Four cock rings,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the eighth day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe,
Eight pairs of handcuffs,
Seven sounding spankings,
Six enema kits,
Five anal beads,
Four cock rings,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the ninth day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe,
Nine sets of paddles,
Eight pairs of handcuffs,
Seven sounding spankings,
Six enema kits,
Five anal beads,
Four cock rings,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the tenth day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe,
Ten hanky-pankies,
Nine sets of paddles,
Eight pairs of handcuffs,
Seven sounding spankings,
Six enema kits,
Five anal beads,
Four cock rings,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the eleventh day of Christmas,
I gave my sexy babe,
Eleven studded collars,
Ten hanky-pankies,
Nine sets of paddles,
Eight pairs of handcuffs,
Seven sounding spankings,
Six enema kits,
Five anal beads,
Four cock rings,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

On the twelfth day of Christmas,
My lover gave to me,
Twelve fucks and kisses,
Eleven studded collars,
Ten hanky-pankies,
Nine sets of paddles,
Eight pairs of handcuffs,
Seven sounding spankings,
Six enema kits,
Five anal beads,
Four cock rings,
Three butt plugs,
Two silken scarves,
And a most lovely vanilla lube.

Comments

[turps33.livejournal.com]

I love it! So much better than the real one. I want that stuff for my 12 days of Christmas!

I especially like the studded collars ;)

[castalie.livejournal.com]

Thanks, me happy you like it *g* I got my own version of the song, and kinky like I wanted it-whee *proud smile*

Believe it or not, but the eleventh day gave me the most trouble. The rest was easy, but forthis one I couldn't find anything that fit (or almost fit), so I'm definitely glad you liked the result. Plus, I was starting to pout because I hadn't added my beloved collars yet! So I was happy once I'd found that one *eg*

[yami-tai.livejournal.com]

*big hentai grin* I liked it... *looks around for Jack and Danny* So what are you going try first, guys??!!!

[castalie.livejournal.com]

Well, let's the boys be organized and disciplined, and let them choose the items following the order of the song *eg*

Glad you liked it *bows*

[yami-tai.livejournal.com]

let them choose the items following the order of the song *eg*

*dreamy faraway look* Good plan!!

[x5-536.livejournal.com]

hahha now i'd KILL to hear that on the radio!

[castalie.livejournal.com]

Man this is *weird*. I did receive that comment in my mailbox, but when I checked on my LJ, it didn't appear, no matter how many times I refreshed the page! Sometimes, LJ is really scary *shakes head*

Tell me about dying to hear that kind of song on the radio! lol I'm pretty proud of it, I must say *g*

[x5-536.livejournal.com]

LJ is PMSing baad. comments get lost, entries don't show =\ gah.

you've got a dirty mind ;)

[castalie.livejournal.com]

LJ is indeed a little bitch sometimes.

And I do have a dirty mind- and you love it! *smug look*

[x5-536.livejournal.com]

oh and i just read your last entry. JsD belongs to ningyouhime and nevskaya =) just like jackslashdaniel bwahaha, i thought you knew!

[castalie.livejournal.com]

I'm part of jackslashdaniel, but it's been so long since I checked it out that I even forgot the name of the mods- so yeah, I ignored that little detail *g*

When I saw who the archivist was, I was like, 'oh yeah, sounds pretty logical to me'! lol

[x5-536.livejournal.com]

and they run lots of LJ communities like jd_daily, sam_daily, davis_daily yadda yadda yadda =)

bwahaha i remember when jackslashdaniel was created. angellemyst and i were in denial about J/D and we were like "we only joined because we're curious".

haha. look at me now.

[castalie.livejournal.com]

we were in denial about J/D and we were like "we only joined because we're curious

You're kidding me!!

[x5-536.livejournal.com]

NOPES! one year ago, i would have laughed at you if you'd mentioned J/D to me. bwahaha.

[absinthfire.livejournal.com]

My god!:P Where you a het, err, Jack/Sam, fan the whole time?

[x5-536.livejournal.com]

ERRR NOOOOOO! O_O.

i was just a lonely Genner =)

i've never read het. in any fandom.

[absinthfire.livejournal.com]

Alrighty then. I've never read a Jack/Sam fic. Don't ever plan on it. The idea scares the crap out of me! My first J/D fic was about 2 maybe even 3 years ago. It was mind blowing. Then I got out of it(pc broke) and now I'm obsessively back.

[castalie.livejournal.com]

Girls! Please tell me you're *not* talking about Het in *my* LJ! *glare*

[x5-536.livejournal.com]

the first J/D fics i read were not convincing AT ALL. and with hindsight, i realise that's what got me to dislike bottom!daniel and FT fics.

but this is changing now. i'm learning to appreciate bottom!daniel again although i'm still skeptic about FT fics.

[castalie.livejournal.com]

i'm learning to appreciate bottom!daniel again

YAY! I won't tire of hearing about it!

I love me some bottom!Daniel *eg* Bottom!Daniel rocks my world, floats my boat and stirs my coffee lol

[x5-536.livejournal.com]

dials your gate!!!

::coughs:: and anyway, it's partly your fault for pointing Pepe out to me ;)

[castalie.livejournal.com]

And I'm *so* bloody proud of that one!

[absinthfire.livejournal.com]

I can join the legions of the pissed now! I haven't received any replies at all today! Grrr. I don't even know where to start. I have a few min. while my bro is out. I love Pepe. I will sell myself for the next installment of "The Edge of Darkness" series. She told me it's coming but it takes a lot out of her cause she puts so much of herself in it, ya know? And it's such a dark place they're in.

[absinthfire.livejournal.com]

I love your song, now you've got me thinking of my own lyrics and THAT can be scary! I LMAO at the anal beads and the butt plugs. Maybe it's just cause I'm in RoTK mode so I was thinking of Elijah with them in! Ahhh. Need dirty smutty fic now! You don't reed LoTR fic do you? Point me toward a good first story? I don't want to read a shitty one my first time out the gate.

[castalie.livejournal.com]

I'm not surprised you like it, you naughty girl, you! Why don't you do your own, then? Suddenly, I'm having some pervie ideas for other xmas songs- where will this stop? *eg*

As for LoTR fics, no I'm not into that fandom sorry, although I did read some fics. Sorry, don't know enough to rec you some. Although I feel like after watching RoTK, I'll crave some good LoTR slash!

[absinthfire.livejournal.com]

When I have some time I think I will write one, when my older brother isn't looking over my shoulder. Sweetie that he is I don't think he'd much like it. And then too will I go with a vengeance after LoTR fic. So k that you don't know any worth asking.